appreciation

This has by far been one of the best years of my life. I am so grateful for the personal growth I've achieved in the past 12 months so I'm going to take a few moments to humble brag. My parents have both been struggling with addiction, mental illness, and have just been a chaotic force in my life since I can remember and I've always done a pretty good job at keeping them at an arms length but somehow they've always managed to suck me back in. This year I finally accepted that this is who they are and it's totally okay to love them but still keep yourself at a safe distant. I've finally come to understand that I don't need to feel guilty every time they try to hit me up for money and I need to say no, or for choosing not attend holiday dinner. This acceptance has really given me the ability to finally realize that this is there life and they are going to live it the way they want regardless of how I feel so there is no need to worry, I actually feel like that has given me some peace.

I've made some pretty significant changes to my own lifestyle to better myself and my health. I've started working out regularly, eating much cleaner. I don't drink very often and I quit smoking. I quit a job that was making me miserable. I've been able to eliminate a lot of negative energy from my life. I'm still not perfect but I'm at least starting to like who I am, and I'm comfortable with the opinions other peoples may have of me.

My boyfriend has played a huge role in both of these things. He has been there as my rock and sometimes my therapists when family issues have just gotten to be "too much." He's been so accepting and willing to be there for me no matter what. He's also been a great motivator in my lifestyle journey. He's so willing to try anything with me, whether it be lifting weights or yoga, eating kale and quinoa, or watching American Horror Story and eating ice cream. I appreciate him more than he realizes.

The point of this really was not to brag, I just wanted to share how much things can change in a year. How things can go from negative to positive, you just need to change your outlook and have a little determination.